“I like big…and I cannot lie!”

It all started with my saying, "My butt is tired," after having spent hours in front of the computer. It just so happened that it was Tuesday. The day of our language lesson and therefore a day filled with all of the language practice that we didn't do the rest of the week. So, naturally, since we had just learned the word for "tired" (kapoy), Geoff asked a Filipino friend for the word "butt" so that he could translate my statement (which, by the way, is "Kapoy ang akong laput.") Later that evening, Geoff and our friends Manny and Michael were traveling back from Agdao, a slum community where they had been hanging out with the teenagers. Geoff being Geoff, he began practicing his new words with Michael, also a teenager. Now knowing "butt" in Cebuano, it is naturally assumed that good practicing would include previous vocabulary such as "white" or "round" and ownership words such as "my" and "his". You can put the pieces together. Here's where it gets funny. The whole time they are in the taxi cracking up about Geoff's word combinations, Manny is watching the taxi driver whose face does not move a muscle. Absolutely no reaction at all. In fact, it is the lack of reaction that caught Manny's attention. Eventually, Geoff and Michael are let out, and Manny is alone in the car. The taxi driver turns to him and says seriously, "that American white guy…he is a missionary?!...What he is saying…that is not nice. He is naughty!" (Should note here that Geoff was also wearing a doo rag and his black utilikilt. You know, the normal Geoff attire.) Manny, being quick on his feet says, "Oh no, he is not a missionary! He has a band here. And for Americans, it's okay to talk that way." Taxi driver: "Are YOU a missionary?" Manny: "Yes, I am the missionary." HA! So now, somewhere in Davao is a devout Taxi driver who is earnestly praying for Manny to have the strength and wisdom to evangelize his friend, Geoff J And needless to say, Geoff has learned where NOT to say "butt".